Dating Digitally: The Dating App Dilemma
Digital Dating Discoveries: Dating Apps & Individual Relationship Therapy Online in California
Many individuals that I work with in Individual Relationship Therapy Online in California often state that many frustrations arise with the relatively new method of dating online. With all of the various options of dating apps currently on the market, shouldn’t dating be easy? Especially in this pandemic, shouldn’t we feel more connected? Well, this depends on what approach you take when dating. Shall we start looking at the various trends in digital dating? It seems it’s pervasive in our society (especially here in California) and is an excellent way to gradually wade more in-depth into the discovery of uncovering more about what you are looking for in the digital dating world.
Dating Apps certainly allow us to connect with others to whom we would otherwise not have access. Depending on whether you are on a free or paid application, your success may vary. Suppose you are in the explorative phase of dating and figuring out what you want in a relationship. In that case, you might be leaning toward free applications that allow you to date several people, until you have a better picture of what you are looking for (that’s another blog altogether). Or you may have a sense of what you are looking for and feel more invested and ready to be in a relationship, which may have you exploring paid applications to connect with other individuals who have prepared to put effort and investment into finding a partner.
Some of the questions I may ask my individual relationship therapy clients are: How would you like to portray yourself? Are you catching yourself wanting to post an older photo of yourself or make your career seem more appealing? In a society where we measure beauty or material wealth consistently, I’m sure there is ample temptation to insert various white lies. I certainly can understand this, but for those who are genuinely hoping to match with a potential life partner with whom you can build a future, I hope these blogs can be helpful. Even if you are still figuring out what to look for, I hope these explorations will bring some insight and clarity. I hope that these future discussions will lead us down a path of internal reflection and comfort in expressing your core self to others, discovering more about your fears, what’s getting in the way and how we approach dating in our search for partnership.
Internal reflection and expression can help us gain clarity in what we are searching for, and having an Individual Relationship Therapist can help you figure out how to do this and what is most important to you. Online dating can also indeed lead us down a path of false expectations, as we feel connected to the pictures we see or the profiles that people post about how they would like to be perceived. Unfortunately, many of them may only be giving you limited information. Research from OpinionMatters shows that 53% of people lie on their online dating profiles. The most common lies are age, height or weight, and job or income. Lying in any relationship is unhealthy, but lying before you even meet the person is just setting yourself up for failure.
We will explore what tactics are often seen in digital dating, what causes people to either distance away or approach toward, the do’s and don’ts, and how to keep the momentum going. We will also be discussing how sexual chemistry and desire play into this complex interaction, how we outline what we are looking for in a relationship, and how we behave and show up for potential partners.
So here is the start of a series of blogs focused on dating:
how to stay focused
how to avoid burnout
what to look out for and more!
Are you ready? Let’s delve into it!
I hope this helps you get closer to what you are looking for in the world of dating. If you are looking for help with dating fatigue or burnout, curbing your anxiety, getting out of toxic relationships, or figuring out what you are looking for and how to go about it in the dating world you can read more about how we can help here.
Relationships Redefined specializes in helping couples and individuals find fulfillment, connection, trust, and healthy communication in their relationships and offers online counseling focused in couples therapy & marriage counseling, individual therapy, premarital counseling, and intimacy and sex therapy in San Diego and all of California. Book a free 15-minute online consultation with us here! Make Intimacy Your Reality!